Friday, September 20, 2013

I Am a Lamp.

Hello darlings. I haven't wrote a blog post in months. I don't know why I am feeling called to blog today, but I know that God has put it on my heart to blog today. Maybe even more than just today. I hate to be that girl who is so sporadic, the one you can't depend on; but at the same time, what's the point in sharing your life and your feelings with the world if you aren't feelin' it?

Let me first say that over the last few months, God has done work in my life. Major work. Now, I was saved four years ago this December so I'm not saying He hasn't been working for all four years. But I have pushed away from Him, tried to hide in the darkness from His light. It doesn't work y'all. But these past few months have been phenomenal. I don't usually want to share my feelings and pour my emotions all over the internet, but I just feel like He is calling me to be vulnerable, to be bold. My thought process on this is that even if no one reads this post, it's out there. If someone comes searching, they might just find what they have been searching for.

I can't even explain the timeline of my life the last few months, I've bought a house, failed two classes, gone through a breakup, been betrayed, been lied to, been heartbroken, been used, gone back to church, dove in head first helping out with the youth, drank bottles of wine by myself, cried myself to sleep, but the most important thing that has happened since the beginning of 2013 is that I have found God again. I have rekindled the fire that burns in my heart, that fire that drives me to be as Christlike as possible. I have found that and I have vowed to never, ever let it go out again. My little light is going to shine.

I don't know when I will post, or what it will always be about. But I can tell you that I am a single girl, I'm a single Christian girl in a world of girls who are having babies at 16 and getting married at 19. In a world where girls lose every ounce of innocence they have before they ever step foot in high school. I am a Christian lady who was not raised in a Christian home. I am a Christian lady in a place full of evil, fleshy desires. And for the rest of you Christian girls out there, it's us against the world. So although I can't promise you when or how much I plan on blogging. I can promise that my light is going to shine. I am going to make every. single. day. worthwhile. And I am going to wholeheartedly serve each and every human being that I can, because Christ died so that I could truly live.

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